april is here!

i just reread the last entry i wrote and i can't believe how long ago that was! two months later, the 3rd grade teacher has returned but we've lost our 6th grade teacher. my classroom management and teaching is somewhat a disaster but i've hit a stride that i think is comfortable and i'm basically waiting out my time this year until i can start anew next year. i feel bad saying that i am giving up on these kids and i hate to admit it, but i've sort of let go. i'm not sure what the first year of teaching is supposed to be like but i am certain i will not be a fantastic teacher. and at this point in my life, i feel okay with that. in october, i think i would have disagreed.

i had a student who was out for about 2 weeks before easter vacation and he just returned today. it wasn't until he returned that i noticed how the class dynamic had changed without him. it is true that the kids argued somewhat less and gross/inappropriate words were not used. it's so amazing how one student can change the entire class and with a group of 12, the difference is only magnified.

i also have come to realized how much influence knowledge of a certain local area has to do with teaching. i am unfamiliar with the area i live in and the common occurrences in dc and i wonder how much more effective i could be if i just have a simple knowledge of what theme parks kids go to in the summer or even what grocery store! so cal kids would never go to a giant or king's dominion and washitonians (washingtonian?) would never go to knott's berry farm or ralph's. this really only came up because i just got back from being home for a week.

i didn't realize how much i missed my family until this month! even christmas didn't pull up these feelings. i'd say 7 months is a quite a long time to suddenly be homesick :D

p.s. i feel sometimes that this blog is completely useless. hah!